I was asked to tell the kids the story of the bald frog..

Once there was a groggy frog, who drunk too much and swore too much and fucked around too much. All these excesses had turned him into a weakling. A quivering leaf of dazed, shaky unsteadiness. His diet consisted mainly of pizza boxes and chocolate wrappers, and that only when he could bear (oh the animal puns!) the thought of food, which was once in a blue moon.-literally.

So his hair fell out. He made himself a wig out of a banana peel. He'd remembered to write on it with a ballpoint pen- it was a cheap high. He loved his wig. and it's decomposition provided tasty flies for him. A bit like me. only less bourgeois, more upper class. He was happy, until the false hair followed the natural course of what is will seize to be inevitably, one day.

So he went to the doctors and was told he's anaemic-due to shit nutrition. Initially they thought he was anorexic. then they realised, by the unsteadiness and urge to move, that it was all excesses-induced. They gave him some Berocca, they told him to eat steak, despite it being super unethical, and told him to fuck off, as he was making the nurses and the other waiting clients of the surgery uneasy with his jerkiness and twitches. He then drunk the Berocca, and felt miles better.

He made himself a cup of coffee, and realised that orangey fizzy vitamins taste horrendous when followed by coffee. He drunk the coffee nonetheless. He smiled to his reflection in the downstairs tiny mirror, next to the key box. ''I look crap.'' He went upstairs for a long nap.

The End

(Internal Thoughts: And then he died? is that too much of plagiarism? wouldn't the distance between this additional comment and the story make it legit? Three 'Enters'. I could pretend it wasn't intended to go along with this.
Also: to mark the end of this sentence in parentheses with a stop or not? this is a very damaging debate for my small head. it can't fit the constant 'strugglation'. oh make up your mind)